Sorry to be gone so long and leave everybody on the edge of their seats wondering what the heck happened that night in Venezuela, but I went and enjoyed a Disney weekend with my family.  Since getting off the ship I have been sick and out of sorts and a day hanging with Pooh is exactly what the doctor ordered.  I had a great time but now that I am settled into my recliner and watching Monday Night Football on my big TV it is time to return to my sworn duties of writing crap that very few people want to read.

But thanks to those few of you who do want to read it!  PiratePooh has gone global and has been read in over 15 countries.  Of course, the US represents my main readership but I get quite a few visits from Venezuela.  Wassup, Venezuela!!!  I hope all you fine people realize how much I love the average Venezuelan citizen.  Maybe someday I will have the opportunity to enjoy all the fine things I am sure your country has to offer.  I travel all over the world and I have met many people that disliked me simply because I am American and they didn’t like something about our government or foreign policy.  I promise I am not one of those people.  I hope to someday treat all of you to some chicken wings and an ice cold Polar.

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Blog music for the night is Gimme Shelter by The Rolling Stones.  It just feels like one of those nights.

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Let me refresh your memory.  It is about nine o’clock at night and I have wandered outside to get some fresh air and use my phone.  As I walked out of the house and onto the fantail the AB who was on watch walked around the corner looking very concerned.  I asked him what was up and he shouted, “It’s our biggest fear!!  They are on the dock with guns, handcuffs and a paddy wagon!!”  He then dashed inside because he was looking for the Captain.

I think it is important to make a point here.  It is easy to sit here now and say that nothing happened.  That the seventeen days in Maracaibo were not a big deal because we weren’t imprisoned, tortured or beaten and that we came out of things unharmed, so what’s the big deal?  On one hand, there is no big deal.  We did come out of it fine, with a pretty cool story to boot.  But the reason that it is a pretty cool story is because unpleasant things did happen.  And while they weren’t horrible, nights like this one were not pleasant.

I just don’t want to give the impression that I am trying to make things more than they were.  But I am not going to make things less than they were either.  This particular night was a little scary at the time.  It you read on, I think you will find out why.

For the last day we had gone from having the gangway down, which is normal procedure, to having it up.  This meant that people couldn’t gain access to the ship without us making the decision to lower the gangway.  What we were now facing was about thirty men, some in all black uniforms with automatic rifles and some in civilian clothing with side arms, demanding that they be allowed to board.

This was a very uncomfortable half an hour.  I can’t speak for anybody else but I thought there was a good chance we were going to be arrested.  I mean, why else would they be there in the middle of the night?  I called my parents and told them that if they didn’t hear from me the next morning to please start calling God and everybody else and find out what was going on.  At this point, I was basically giving them hourly updates so they would know I was safe.

I was at the gangway with several other crewmembers and the Captain was on the phone.  Eventually he received the word from somebody that we would have to let them on board.  They instructed that the entire crew be assembled on the fantail.  I have to tell you that this wasn’t a good feeling.  There was some sense of security inside the house but having the entire crew outside felt like one step closer to jail.

I got jumped on a bit for using the expression, “held at gunpoint.”  Well, I used that on Facebook and if you read my Facebook posts you know that they are always off-the-wall.  Nobody in Venezuela ever pointed a gun at me.  I have had guns pointed at me in Iraq so I do know the difference.  With that being said, if men holding rifles are standing between me and my home and they are using that force to keep me from entering my home, I don’t think it is a crazy exaggeration to say they had us at gunpoint.  But no, they didn’t stick the guns in our face.

Without directly pointing the guns at us the soldiers who were all dressed in black held us on the fantail of the ship.  The Captain and the Chief Mate were talking to the undercover guys.  It became readily apparent that they were there to arrest some, if not all, of us.  I say this because the Captain was practically shouting that he wasn’t letting them take the crew ashore.  This is when I chose to get in a little trouble.

I will readily admit that I wanted the world to know what was going on.  I thought the greatest protection we had was the press, our family and especially our government bringing pressure on the Venezuelan officials.  I still believe that.  With that in mind I pulled out my phone and snapped a picture of all the guys with guns.

You can probably guess that didn’t go over to well.  They quickly demanded my phone.  I said no.  It got a little nasty and the Chief Mate, who speaks a little Spanish, interceded and reached an agreement that I could keep my phone if I deleted the picture.  I pretended to delete the picture but really sent it to Facebook.  Sorry to lie to you Venezuelan secret police but let’s face it, we weren’t going to be friends anyway.  You will just have to learn to live with the betrayal.

I thought I had made it through unscathed but the head secret police guy wasn’t happy with the deal and demanded that the soldier take my phone.  I again refused and the next thing I knew I was sandwiched between two guys with guns demanding my phone.

What are you gonna do?  I gave them my phone.

I did get it back eventually.  There was one guy there who turned out to be pretty cool and he got it back for me, as well as three other phones that were confiscated.  That guy was in the picture until the very end so maybe he had some clout.  Anyway, thank you cool guy in the Yankees shirt!

However, at that point in time I thought my phone was gone so now I was pissed and a little scared.  About thirty minutes of this nonsense went on and then we were told to go to the crew mess hall.  The Chief Mate was left to watch the gangway and the Captain was taken to his office.

It was a tense time in the crew mess.  Everybody deals with fear differently.  Again, I can’t speak for my crew but I think they would all say that on this night nobody was feeling all that great.  Nobody knew what to say and a silence had fallen over the room when the Captain walked in.

This particular Captain is a pretty cool customer.  He handles most situations without getting too worked up.  He was visibly upset and more nervous than I ever imagined seeing him.  The message he had for the crew didn’t make anybody happy.

He told us that ten of us had to volunteer to go to jail and then be questioned.  If ten people didn’t volunteer then all of us would be handcuffed and taken against our will.  Apparently he had talked to our attorneys and the company and there was nothing we could do about it.

I have lived kind of a crazy life and been in situations that you wouldn’t believe even if I had video tape evidence show you.  Having said that, I have never experienced a feeling quite like the one I had when I was informed that I was going to a Venezuelan jail at midnight.  Trust me kiddos, it isn’t pleasant.

Sorry Venezuelans.  I do like you guys but I don’t want to go to one of your jails.  Your screwy government has been holding one of our citizens for months for no real reason that I can discern.  It is not a penal system that I care to be a part of.  Think less of me if you want.

But I volunteered.  Why?  Well, I am a tough guy and a badass, that’s why.  Really, I can’t tell you why other than I am a writer and that is what a good writer would do.  You have to put yourself in situations to get the good story.  I never believed I would be shot or tortured.  And truthfully, there were a few people including a lady on the ship that I didn’t want to see put in that situation.

My partner in crime on the ship volunteered to go with me and I left the room to change clothes.  I had foolishly forgotten to bring my jail clothes but I found something suitable.

I am sure we would have come up with eight more volunteers but it never came to that.  The Chief Mate came over the radio and said that they were taking the Captain and leaving the rest of the crew.  We all had to stay inside the house until the Captain was gone.

It was a weird feeling.  I guess we were all glad not to be going to jail but our Captain was being taken.  We couldn’t go up on deck to wish him well and that didn’t make sense to me.  Now we were in a hostile environment on a ship with no Captain.

I can’t tell you what a bad night it was.  I didn’t sleep a minute.  Again, it wasn’t because I was afraid for my life but it was not a good situation.  I fired off emails to everybody I could think of asking for help.

The next day I was famous.

Next up, “Shouldn’t I be getting paid by Facebook for all this free advertising?”

Russell Yale

 

Your poem for the day

“I went to Disney to hang with Pooh

I hung out at ESPN to watch LSU

I once saw a cow and he said moo

Those black uniformed wearing gun carrying jackbooted jerk-offs wanted to arrest me and my crew”